March 2012
Woman: Can I have birth control?
Government: No.
Woman: I got pregnant because I didn't have birth control and I don't want the fetus. Can I have an abortion?
Government: No.
Woman: I gave birth to my child but since I wasn't expecting it, I can't afford daycare. Can I have help paying for it?
Government: No.
Woman: Well, why can't I have birth control?
Government: Because. Sex isn't for recreation.
Woman: It can help regulate my period and benefit me in other ways.
Government: Too bad.
Man: For no reason other than for recreational sex, may I have birth control?
Government: Do you have a penis?
Man: YES, YES I DO!!
Government: WELL HOWDY, VALID CITIZEN. You can buy condoms by the dozens. Here, here's a pack of special condom for "His Pleasure." Oooh, these come in different colours and flavours. Here, try these. They have ribs on them. And this one glows in the dark!! LOL OMG DICK LIGHTSABER!!
Government: But seriously, you're a man. You can do what ever you want.
Woman: But-
Government: Shut up, you sinning, freeloading hussy.
I wonder if anyone stalks my Tumblr...
if so…
hello there .
extreme makeover: home edition
girl: i kinda like horses
ty: WE MADE YOUR ROOM INTO A HORSE AND DECORATED IT WITH HORSES AND HERE WE GOT YOU 3 PET HORSES AND WE ARE PAYING FOR SURGERY TO MAKE YOU A HORSE
Me while babysitting
totally-relatable:
(via Totally-Relatable: The funniest relatable posts.)
me: wow I'm actually happy right now
life: lol now hold on just one minute
I feel bad for people that don't have Tumblrs....
totally-relatable:
They’re probably like this everyday:
(via Totally-Relatable: The funniest relatable posts.)
Don't let the door hit ya where the good lord...
first discovering a group: omfg how am i going to tell them apart
later in the obsession: omg yes that's him i can tell by his ear shape
When you're trying to cheat and you make eye...
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